Robert L. Park on Hagelin's Physics & Politics

Physicist John Hagelin promised to reduce violent crime by having one thousand TM experts meditate coherently (WN 25 Jun 93). Oops! Preliminary results suggest they got the polarity wrong; homicide hit a record high level. But, at a press conference yesterday, Hagelin offered a lesson in data analysis: although murder is up from a year ago, there has been a decrease of 2.3% in "brutal crime." A clean shot between the eyes maybe. Could the drop in brutal crime be due to the increase in D.C. police surveillance and a new summer jobs program? Those programs, Professor Hagelin explained, have been more than offset by the heat wave--so the field must be working. Patched through to the press conference via satellite link from Holland, Zen master Maharishi Yogi, the intellectual force behind the experiment, explained the success of the experiment: "No one wants to be shot--it's painful." Amen.

The Physics prize went to the Japanese Meteorological Agency for its seven-year study of a possible link between catfish wiggling their tails and earthquakes. The Peace prize went to physicist John Hagelin for his experiment to reduce crime in Washington, DC by the coherent meditation of 4,000 TM experts (WN 25 Jun 93). By coincidence, Hagelin was holding a press conference to announce his final results. It was a data analysis clinic; violent crime, he proudly declared, decreased 18%! Relative to what? To the predictions of "time-series analysis" involving variables such as temperature and the economy. So although the weekly murder count hit the highest level ever recorded, it was less than predicted.

The Democratic Party Platform does not exist yet, so for balance we decided to cover the Natural Law Party, which is holding its convention right here in Washington this week. It offers a 50-point "action plan to revitalize America." For all of America's problems, it seems, there are "scientifically proven solutions." In each case, the proven solution involves "the establishment of coherence-creating groups practicing Transcendental Meditation." The Natural Law Party, according to string-theorist John Hagelin, the NLP nominee for President, "is the third-party to beat."

At a Washington press conference this morning, string theorist and Natural Law Party presidential candidate John Hagelin proposed a more effective air campaign: an elite corps of 7,000 trained Yogic flyers. The trained meditators, he explained, would spread tranquility with a quantum-mechanical consciousness field. It's been proven, he said, citing the 1993 Demonstration to Reduce Violence in Washington,DC. WN covered that demonstration (WN 23 Jul 93). The murder rate in the capital soared to an all-time high during the 8-week project, but Hagelin later explained it would have been 18% higher if the meditators hadn't been there meditating (WN 7 Oct 94). NATO must guarantee the security of the flyers presumably by force. He was perplexed that Madeleine Albright had rejected the plan. The press conference ended with 12 trained yogic flyers bouncing around on mattresses. It was clear to me his plan would work. Serbian troops viewing 7,000 bouncing yogic flyers would be rendered helpless by laughter.

While the power brokers inside the Beltway battle over budgets and missile defenses, the Reform Party is about to begin a month-long primary process. Ross Perot and Jesse Ventura have fallen. Pat Buchanan now faces new-age physicist John Hagelin, vying for a $12.6M taxpayer-financed campaign fund. Can Buchanan's Brigade meet the challenge of Hagelin's corps of yogic flyers (WN 9 Apr 00)?.